I'm Emrys
by apychopathsutopia
Summary: Morgana is holding Arthur, Merlin, Gaius and the brother knights hostage in the search for Emrys. Merlin steps forward and takes a risk that may lead to horrible consequences. But maybe not. . . . Merthur, gentle slash. My first Merthur fic, so go easy on me!


Morgana paced the front of the room, gazing at all the people who stared at her. They were afraid, and she was proud to have been able to strike fear in the hearts of the noble, brave, and strong knights of Camelot.

Arthur, Merlin, Percival, Gwaine, Lancelot, Leon, Elyan, and Gaius were all kneeling in a row, their heads bowed, but their eyes never wavering from the look of triumph on Morgana's face.

Merlin shifted and twitched his leg so that it tapped Arthur's, just so he knew that Arthur was still there; alive; breathing, that somehow Morgana hadn't killed him without his noticing.

"It's a simple question," Morgana said, smiling and scanning each and every face. "Alator, here, told me that Emrys is in this very room."

An uncomfortable whisper shuddered through the prisoners. Merlin looked away.

"Unfortunately," she said, almost under her breath, kicking at the lifeless corpse that had collapsed on the floor, "he didn't live long enough to tell me who."

Arthur stood. "Morgana, let my people go. None of us, see, none of us, are who you call Emrys. We don't know anyone by that name. Kill me, torture me, do what you will with me, but let my men go. They've done nothing wrong, except follow my orders."

Morgana laughed. "Kill you? I'm going to kill you anyway. That way Camelot will once more be in my control; that I may once more sit on the throne of the kingdom that rightfully belongs to me. But, before I can even kill you, there is one called Emrys that I must kill first."

Merlin looked up at Arthur, who had aligned his spine and stood as tall as he could; stone-cold bravery shone in the way his jaw was set and his eyes were cast straight ahead of him, boring holes in Morgana's skull. "The only sorcerer in this room, Morgana, is you."

Morgana smiled. "That is not true."

"Perhaps Alator was lying."

"Believe me, brother," she said, her lips turning downward, "he was not. I ensured that he was telling the truth. I want Emrys, and I want him now."

Morgana cleared her throat, as the volume of her voice had escalated too quickly for her to manage. She had successfully avoided showing any emotions to her captives, but she had let her angry take control.

Merlin looked at Gaius, a plea evident in his eyes, but this time, the old, faithful physician didn't have an answer. He looked back solemnly, a permanent sadness in the way his eyes turned.

"But, Arthur, since you so kindly offered, I'll need you up here a moment." She smiled and held a hand out to him, beckoning him toward her.

Arthur eyed her suspiciously.

"Arthur," Merlin whispered harshly, "don't."

Arthur glanced at Merlin, but dismissed him with a wave of his hand, walking slowly forward.

"Always so noble," Morgana cooed, leading him to a chair at the very front of the room. "Such a brave king; always sacrificing himself for the good of the people." Morgana frowned. "An unwise strategic plan, Arthur, I'm disappointed in you. If Uther had one thing above you it was his ruthless reign over his people. Strict taxes, laws, reckless bravery resulting in the lives of too many men. But, no, Arthur, not you. You're a People's King, aren't you?"

Arthur looked down at his feet, ignoring her taunts.

"Ooh, I'm hurt, brother," Morgana said. She turned away for a moment, and picked something up, careful not to let anybody but her see. When she faced Arthur again, Merlin cringed, his breath caught in his throat.

"Do you know what this is?" Morgana asked, lowering it down so that Arthur could see.

In her palm, a snake hissed.

Arthur shook his head.

"This snake is responsible for the worst pain a mortal human can experience. It has been known to drive men mad, and it strikes in the mind as well as the body. Do you have any idea what I'm going to do with it?"

Arthur shook his head again, his teeth setting firmly in place, mentally imagining the worst pain he'd ever experienced, and trying to find something that would hurt more than it. He prepared his body as much as he could, lifting his head, and staring at nothing, gathering his thoughts.

Morgana laughed, and raised her hand, but before she could begin the torture, Merlin jumped to his feet.

"I am the sorcerer," he stated simply.

Morgana blinked. "You?"

Merlin nodded, a ferocious possessiveness flashing in his eyes. "I'm Emrys."

Arthur turned to look at Merlin, hurt and surprise in his eyes. "Merlin?"

"Let Arthur go," Merlin demanded, glaring at Morgana with more hatred than he had ever felt toward another person.

Morgana dropped the snake and took a few steps backwards, intimidated by his stare. "Or what?" she asked, her voice strong enough, but rough around the edges.

The Young Warlock's eyes turned red in his fury, and all the flames that lined the room along the wall shot upward with an angry sizzling noise. When the shadows cast by the fire ceased to dance, everybody watched Merlin in anticipation, but he simply lowered his hand and said meaningfully, "I think you can guess what."

Morgana shook her head in a building rage. "No. Camelot belongs to me, it is rightfully mine!"

Merlin shook his head, allowing his angry to drain and forcing himself to focus on the problem at hand. "You're wrong. It belongs to Arthur. Arthur is the Once and Future King. You are his bane; the darkness to match our light."

"Your light? And what've you go to do with it?" Morgana asked. "Why, Emrys, must you be following me, destroying what I've been trying to achieve all this time?"

Merlin blinked. Of all the questions he had prepared to answer after all these years of waiting for this moment, he had not anticipated that one. "Arthur and I . . . we're a coin. I'm one side and he is the other. We share our destiny. As do you with us. We must stop you, Morgana."

Merlin glanced quickly at Arthur who gazed at him with confusion, curiousity, and just a bit of fear. All anger had dissipated from Arthur's mind; he could not be angry with Merlin for keeping his magic a secret, it was the perfectly logical thing to do. The Pendragons weren't exactly known for their patience and understanding for something that they had shunned for so long. However, Arthur was slightly hurt that Merlin didn't trust him enough as a friend to tell him.

"Stop me?" Morgana laughed, her confidence increasing with each second Merlin didn't attack. "And how do you plan to do that?"

Merlin lifted his hand again, a light building in his palm and his eyes flashed golden. Morgana flew backwards, her back hitting the stone so hard that it splintered. Morgana cried out as she landed on the floor, reaching a hand to try to caress her shoulder blades.

Morgana laughed through her pain and said in between harsh breathes, "You know that hitting me against a wall will not kill me. I am a High Priestess. No mortal blade can end my life."

"Only a blade scorged in dragon's breath can," Merlin answered. "I know."

Morgana sat up, wincing. "I'm assuming you don't carry those around with you, do you?"

Before Merlin could answer, Morgana chanted something under her breath, and a sword that was leaning against the wall flew forward, aiming directly at Merlin's chest.

"Merlin!" Arthur screamed out, outstretching his hand in panic. And that was when Arthur knew he had forgiven Merlin for not telling him; but perhaps blame was never a thought. The idea of losing him far exceeded his hurt.

Merlin, however, just looked at it, with an almost bored expression, and, when his eyes briefly turned gold, the sword halted, and turned in midair to face Morgana.

"Killing me is going to be much more difficult than that, Morgana," Merlin said, his voice low and dangerous. Arthur blinked: this was a side of Merlin that Arthur never imagined existed; it contradicted the idiotic and foolish masquerade that Merlin conducted nearly every day. But, thinking back on all the memories he could salvage during the whole ordeal, Arthur could sense some bits of the actual Merlin through the mask her typically wore: like when he would give Arthur advice that was far wiser than anything an idiot could come up with.

Morgana whimpered, pressing herself further into the wall, as if she meant to vanish into it.

Merlin stalked forward, vengence clear in his step, and intent obvious in the way his stiff muscles moved. "You've caused so much damage, Morgana," he said quietly. "So many people have had to die. Why, Morgana? Why? Things didn't have to be this way. You could have trusted Arthur; waited for his reign. He'll bring back Albion; he's destined to." He stopped a few feet away from her, the tip of the blade inching closer and closer to her heart.

Suddenly he stopped, and a bit of gangly, goofy Merlin appeared in his face. "Please, Morgana. I don't want to kill you."

Morgana glared up at Merlin, practically foaming at the mouth in anger. "I've said it once, I'll say it again, I'd rather bathe in my own blood than see Camelot fall into the hands of another."

Merlin blinked at her sudden savage statement. He nodded sagely. "Very well." Merlin's eyes flashed gold and the blade sunk deep into her flesh.

Morgana gasped out in pain, looking down at the sword that was sticking out of her chest. She moaned, her back sliding down the wall until she lay on her side, gasping for breath that was becoming more and more scarce. . . .

And with one last sigh, Morgana Pendragon, the ward for the late King of Camelot-turned-High-Priestess, was dead.

Merlin stared at her body for longer than was necessary, contemplating how quickly the moment passed once it had come. He stared at her corpse for two reasons:

1) because he was actually in shock that Morgana's reign of terror was finally over, and at his hands too!

and 2) because he didn't want to face Arthur and the knights' reaction to the fact that was a sorcerer.

Finally, Merlin decided that it couldn't be delayed any longer.

He slowly turned to Arthur.

Arthur was staring at him, his mouth open in awe.

"Arthur, I -" he began quietly.

"Save it, Merlin," Arthur said dismissively, standing up on wobbly knees. "I don't want an excuse."

Merlin nodded, his eyes cast down. It was one of the reactions he'd expected, but none of the situations in his dreams had contained this small amount of anger. (Excluding the fantasy that he was graciously accepted with open arms, but that was what it was: a fantasy.)

"Sire, if I may -" Gaius began, shifting so that he was standing as well.

Arthur turned to him and stated, "You knew."

Gaius nodded.

Arthur addressed the entire room. "And who else knew?"

The rest of the knights rose to their feet, but Lancelot stepped forward. "I knew. But, my Lord, if you'd just -"

"No," Arthur said, shaking his head, looking up at Merlin. "You didn't tell me. How could you not tell me?"

"Arthur, I didn't know what to do," Merlin said, his voice desperate and pleading; lost, like a young man pressured by a destiny a great deal larger than him. "Sire, the one job that I was put on earth to do was to take care of you and to protect you. That was my side of the coin. You were to get all the credit for every time I saved your life. You were to be the glory, and the bravery, and the legacy, and the one everybody remembered until the end of time. My side of the coin?" Merlin laughed bitterly. "I was to make sure that you fulfilled everything you needed to. I was born to protect you. That is the reason I was put on earth; that is the reason for my magic, the magic I was born with; that is the reason I exist, Arthur, is for you. Just for you. And, Arthur, I can't imagine having a greater destiny. I couldn't. But you have to understand, it's been lonely. I've had Gaius, and Lancelot. And you, but I couldn't tell you. There was supposed to be a time and a place for that, which apparently wasn't included in the instruction manuel that Kilgarrah gave me. I've had to figure my destiny out on my own, every detail, every piece to make sure everything is perfect, Arthur, and it is. It's over. My destiny has been fulfilled. So, you can . . . hang me, burn me at the stake, feed me to a pack of wilddereon, I don't care. I've done what I was put here to do, and that was make sure you came out life alive." Merlin looked down at his hands.

Arthur stared at Merlin during his rant, his mouth hanging half open. The knights all looked at each other, trying to decide if they all agreed that the excuse was valid or not. They feared the king's reaction greatly.

Arthur opened his mouth, but then closed it again. Finally, he said, "But I haven't come out of life alive."

Merlin looked up. "What?"

"Well, Merlin, my life's not over yet, so technically, I haven't made it out of life alive."

Merlin gaped. "What?"

Arthur laughed at Merlin's complete lack of understanding. "See? Maybe you've been acting like an idiot for so long that now you actually are an idiot."

Merlin's lost expression softened. "Oh."

"Yeah, oh; Mr. My Destiny Has Been Fulfilled. Your destiny has not been fulfilled until you've polished my armor; honestly, look at it, it's disgusting!"

Merlin smiled. "So, you're not angry?"

"Angry?" Arthur shook his head. "No."

"But you're hurt?"

Arthur blinked. "A bit."

"Because I didn't tell you before?"

Arthur nodded.

"Arthur, I really am sorry -"

Arthur nodded again. "I know. It's alright, Merlin."

"So, you're not angry. Are you afraid?" Merlin taunted.

"Afraid? Of you?" Arthur laughed. "Never. You never have scared me and you never will."

"Eh, don't be so sure. I'm sure I might be able to -" Merlin's eyes flashed gold again, and the flame just behind Arthur sprang upwards.

Arthur jumped and whipped around.

Merlin laughed until he cried at the look of fear that appeared momentarily on Arthur's face.

Arthur frowned. "Don't do that Merlin! I thought Morgana was back!"

"Arthur, are you not seeing her?" Merlin said, motioning to Morgana's body. "I killed her."

Arthur smiled. "You did. You did."

Merlin smiled at Arthur and they gazed at each other for a few moments before Gwaine cleared his throat.

"Are you two done flirting? I'd like to get home so I can sleep in my bed, please."

Merlin flushed scarlet that crept up his ears, and Arthur murmured something along the lines of,

"We were not flirting."

The group walked outside, Arthur and Merlin side by side, shoulders knocking. They laughed together more freely than ever they could before.

They each climbed onto their respective horses and rode off.

Half an hour into the journey, Gwaine drew back to ride in speed with Arthur and Merlin and said to the latter,

"Can you just . . . zap us home or whatever?"

Merlin raised his eyesbrows. "Zap you home?"

"Yeah. This ride is supposed to take three days," Gwaine explained. "And I don't want to be riding for three days. This week has been long enough already."

Merlin shook his head. "Sorry. I can't just . . . zap you home."

"Well, what can you do?" Percival called from behind them.

"Yeah, let's see something," Elyan encouraged.

"It's about time we stop for the night anyway," Gaius said, looking up at the sky that was beginning to turn orange.

Everybody - except for Merlin - agreed that they would rest until morning, and watch Merlin perform some magic tricks.

Once they were settled, and firewood had been gathered, Gaius lowered himself carefully onto the ground and said,

"Merlin, start the fire."

Merlin reached into one of the napsacks to grab the stones to clack together when Arthur laughed and said,

"With magic, you dollophead."

Merlin blushed. "I don't know. I'm getting tired."

"C'mon, Merlin, I've seen you do it time and again," Lancelot said, folding his arms. He leaned into Leon and said in a mock-whisper, "He does it about every time he makes a fire, you know. It takes less time, just being able to chant a few words and have fire right in front of you."

"I don't have to chant a few words," Merlin said with a slight scowl. "Watch." He looked down at the firepit, his eyes flashed gold, and the sticks were engulfed with flames.

Merlin's audience were enraptured, but he just sat back inbetween Arthur and Gaius, and grumbled, "All I did was start a fire."

"Can you make love potions?" Arthur asked abruptly, turning to look at him.

Merlin blinked. "I suppose. I've never really had to before, though. Too busy running around after King Pratdragon."

The knights laughed and Arthur rolled his eyes.

"I was just wondering, because lately I've been feeling as if someone has been sneaking love potions into my wine," Arthur mused.

"Yeah, yeah, you love Gwen, we all know," Gwaine said sarcastically, stretching his legs out to the magic-made fire.

"No," Arthur said, shaking his head. "Not Gwen."

Merlin looked over at him, curiously. "Oooh, who does Arthur fancy now?"

Arthur blushed. "Look, I was just wondering if you made love potions, that's all. Forget I brought it up."

"Oh, come on, Arthur, don't be a pouter. Who is she?" Merlin asked, feeling a weight set in his chest. It was easier to manage when he liked Gwen, because Merlin knew Gwen and some-what approved of her, but whoever Arthur's new infatuation was, would be new to Merlin, and Merlin didn't like that. Jealousy would come all too natural when said person took Merlin by surprise.

"It's not a she."

The group fell quiet.

"Oh," Merlin said, his ears reddening. "Then who is he?"

Arthur blushed further. "I won't tell you. You'll have to guess."

The knights glanced at each other, knowing full well where this conversation was heading. They leaned back and watched the show.

Merlin rolled his eyes. "Does he live in Camelot?"

Arthur nodded.

"Okaaay . . . is he here now?"

Arthur, looked down at his hands, his cheeks aflame. He nodded.

Merlin flew his hands into the air sarcastically. "I've got it! It's Gaius!"

Arthur groaned, the knights laughed, and Gaius smacked Merlin on the back of his head. "This is serious, Merlin," Gaius scolded.

Merlin raised an eyebrow. "Serious?"

"Merlin," Gaius said, giving him a pointed look.

Merlin rolled his eyes again. "Fine, fine. Serious. Is it Leon?"

Arthur chuckled and shook his head.

"Shucks, sorry Leon," Merlin said, leaning forward and sympathetically patting Leon's leg. "Gwaine?"

Arthur pulled a face and shook his head.

"What? You've got to admit, Gwaine's pretty handsome," Merlin said.

Gwaine ran a hand through his hair seductively.

Arthur's face turned into one of disgust.

"Alright, alright," Merlin said with a laugh. "So, it's not Gwaine. Is it Lancelot? The most noble of the knights?"

"Oy, watch it," Percival said, pointing a warning finger at Merlin.

Arthur shook his head.

"Percival!" Merlin exclaimed with a laugh. "It's gotta be Percival!"

"You're gonna be pretty embarrassed when I tell you it's not Percival," Arthur responded with a smile.

"Okay, so it's not Leon, Gwaine, Lancelot, or Percival. Or Gaius. It has to be Elyan, then."

Arthur shook his head.

"But -" Merlin looked around, confused. "There's nobody else. Unless it's you, but we already knew you were in love with yourself."

"It's not me." Arthur gave Merlin a significant look.

"Is there a bandit or something in the shadows that I'm not seeing? There's nobody else here," Merlin said, frustrated.

"Yes there is," Lancelot said with a smile. "Come on, a great warlock like yourself must be able to figure it out!"

"Right!" Merlin said with a laugh. "Whoever it is, isn't actually here, just here in spirit! Oh, Arthur, that's so thoughtful -"

"You're so stupid sometimes, Merlin," Arthur said with a huff.

Merlin's eyes furrowed. "I don't understand."

"It's Emrys," Arthur deadpanned.

Merlin flushed scarlet, immediately incapacitated. "B-but - but . . . that's . . . that can't be right -" He looked down at his hands, his brow contorted in hasty thought and incomprehension. "How can that be right?"

Arthur laughed warmly. "I don't know; to be honest, I wasn't prepared for it to be right, but now. . . ."

Merlin looked up from his hands and gazed at Arthur, his eyes wide and innocent.

"Now, I'm very happy it's right."

Merlin stared for a moment, but then got the largest grin on his face. It spread from his lips to his ears, and his dimples were more defined than Arthur had ever seen them.

Arthur felt himself being drawn to Merlin's dimples, admiring how well they matched the entirety of his face, but then Merlin's smile fell and the dimples disappeared. Arthur had the nagging desire to look back into Merlin's eyes, to make sure he was alright, but his lips were also on his mind. He decided that it would be a good idea to just . . . stare at his lips.

And then a crazy idea came into Arthur's head: I wonder what they taste like.

He inwardly shrugged, and leaned forward, capturing Merlin's lips in his own. Something surged through his veins; this heat that warmed his body from his soul to the surface of his skin, it felt like magic.

Arthur was startled when he heard loud popping noises above his head; he jumped and pulled back.

"What're those?" Arthur asked, trying to regain some of his faculties. He gestured vaguely to the flashing lights that popped and sizzled and disappeared. Fireworks.

Merlin looked up sheepishly. "That's never happened before."

"Are you glad it's right?" Arthur asked, suddenly pulling Merlin flush against his skin.

Merlin laughed. "I am glad it's right. And, you know, it's right for me, too."


End file.
